Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Second Verse, Same as the First!

Welcome to Month 4, Cycle Day 2!

Does the exclamation mark make you feel like I am happy? That I am positive? That I am in no way wondering what is wrong with my system because I had 2 perfectly viable follicles last month, and obviously ovulated because my period came with no further drug help, and still am without child?

Would it help if I had more than 1 exclamation mark?

For those who have been following the last few months, tonight I get to go to the pharmacy and pick up the wonderful Chlomid drug. Tomorrow I begin taking 3 pills a day for five days, increasing the hormones in my system to the point where I begin to weep before I even peel the skin off an onion. Somewhere deep in my brain, I feel sorry for the onion and the babies it could have had, and now I am killing it....

Seriously.

Oh! And the wonderful headaches that come with the hormone overdose! Yay!

No, I am not bitter. I swear it.

I just want to be pregnant. I really really do. And if believing in Santa will make it happen, I will go door to door to convince people he really is real.

Which I realize is letting all of you know just how desperate I am getting....

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