Friday, May 11, 2012

The One Where Our Parenting Choices Come Back to Bite Us in the Ass

James is actually pretty independent.

He will play for hours on end with his toys alone.  When we all hit the floor to play, he goes between us and his toy area and just examines everything.  He is a true free spirit in that way, with no real rhyme or reason to anything.

We've been lucky that he enjoys doing his thing.  Earlier this week, my FIL had to watch him for about 90 minutes, and James never made a peep.  He played in his play area with his toys, would stand and "talk" through it with his grandfather, and then go back to playing.

Like I said, he's independent, and he likes it that way.  We are pretty lucky.

So, we have had our pre-op visit for next week's surgery.  On May 16th, James is having the cleft in his palate repaired.

We're already anxious about it, what he'll go through, and what we'll need to do to get him through it.  The thought of him being operated on makes me nauseated, and A can't talk about it because this is his son.  This is the child that he won't let people give a strange look, and he has to surrender him to people with sharp instruments.

The surgeon explained the procedure to us carefully, explaining what will be happening and discussing with us about recovery.

That's when the worst news came.


My little climbing monkey will be spending 3-4 weeks in what the doctor referred to as "no-nos".

Basically, in order to prevent him from tearing anything he will not be allowed to put anything in his mouth.  And to insure this happens he will be in "restraints" that will keep his arms straight.

They will need to be worn at all times unless he is sitting with us and we can prevent him from putting things in his mouth.

Like his thumb.

I'm not looking forward to this.  I cried on the drive home because I just cannot imaging him in those things when he is so used to be oning his own doing everything.  We've never had to restrain him, even stopped swaddling him at the hospital after being born so that he would be able to sleep.

So, now surgery is looming, but I feel as if the worst will be the weeks following.  Luckily I have the two weeks following the procedure off, planning to spend time with my mom during her visit, so we'll be able to focus on him without work interfering.

But it's still going to be heartbreaking.


  1. You both have the best attitude when it comes to dealing with Sweet Baby James' health obstacles! If anyone can deal with it you can! It just means you will have to hold him more and lets be honest who wouldn't want to hold his little chunky self :) If you get sleepy bring him to me and I will hold him....

  2. Thank you, Beth. That really means the world to both of us.